Windows

They were cleaned recently, all the interior stuff including kid handprints and doggy nose. The dog now stays away from the windows and just sits looking at the squirrels below. Then she dreams of planning her attack. Dreams.

I looked at a place I loved years ago and looking at the layout yesterday found out it was not for us. Why? Too many windows. It would be a great bachelor pad, which it is now. It does not allow us, ok me, to have art in terms of heritage quilts, paintings from my father who took up painting at age 80. Photos from friends and ones I’ve taken and all are judiciously framed.

Who would ever ask for fewer windows? Me. We have 12 windows floor to ceiling, This has 27 floor to ceiling. It does not work for us office-wise or otherwise and would be a bad choice.

That’s the way it is, until something else comes up. Another city, another view. Not another husband or dog anytime. I love them too much. Dee

Review

I got one today, and not from my husband, I made an error. I used someone else’s beef (the butcher’s) that was rough ground. I usually buy, cut and grind my own mix.

The butcher came out, as I had given them a sample Pedernales Texas Chili and said the flavors were great but the grind was too coarse and he felt some gristle. So did I, but gave it to them to taste for the grind and flavor.

His comments were appreciated, usually I cut and grind my own meat but there was a sale on that day so I asked for it to be roughly ground. It was too rough, he agreed.

They’re getting new grinder equipment that will allow for more definition from their cuts. I’d rather buy, cut and grind my own and make chili and give my butchers another taste.

I love bringing food into a grocery store! Most people won’t tell me what was wrong with it (texture) but he did and I thank him for that. Learn something every day, politics, love, patience, food. Dee

Books

I’ve a seven year-old cell phone that the new ones sneer at. I also love books and the errant lands where I may be when everything is digitized.

I love paper, my books. Sitting on my bed with books a long time ago, on my bed because that was the only room I could afford to heat to 55 degrees in the winter while I planned dinner parties for friends and out-of-town guests. The other rooms were at 45 degrees and bathroom at nothing because it was not zoned, until guests arrived.

My parents bought me an arctic weight comforter one year and it allowed me to peruse several cookbooks at a time atop the duvet cover. I’d invite guests, shop and prep and cook in a tiny place with the frig door facing the wrong way, a bete noire of mine. All the planning was made from my cookbooks and notes taken from bed at a warm 55 degrees underneath my comforter.

Today I’ve the benefit of cooking school. I still love my books and can’t get new ones on my iPhone because it’s just too old. It allows me to talk to my husband and others so it’s OK.  There’s a new comforter and cover, at least 15 years old. Most of my instincts tell me what to cook as to what is in the market and some ideas I look to online because I was away from my cookbooks for several years as all of our stuff was in storage. I get lots of ideas and actually bring food into the grocery store to reward my providers and get comments.

Books of all sorts brought me alive as a young child and continue to do so. My husband will tell you I love paper, and I do. For a recent marriage I sent cookbooks and spices because I taught the bride rudimentary cooking when she was a kid.

I buy out-of-print cookbooks for kids, newlyweds all the time. What happens when the pipeline closes? No one will know the classics of all time. Paper. Handling something that has meaning. I’ll keep my cookbook collection and my husband will keep his technical book collection for reference, and inspiration. I have recipes, he has numerical recipes.

Like the movies, kids have no idea of Casablanca, Gone With The Wind, even The Wizard of Oz. Everyone buys prepared foods or orders out. I know because I cook. My kitchen sink nearly gave out last week because I actually use it.

Books, paper, I have many cookbooks here that I cherish, and don’t want paper to go away. Preserve books and history, Dee

See You Friday

My husband was absent for most of seven months last year, on business. Dog Zoe and I learned to live on our own.

Now he left this morning, the Tuesday after Columbus day for which he paid for by not being paid but we had a nice long weekend.

Tuesday morning, early, we got to say goodbye, see you Friday! He’ll be home for the weekend. “See you Friday” is one of the nicest things I’ve ever heard him say.

I love you, of course, is the best. But three days away is good enough. Dee & Z

Reaching

I thought getting married and having kids was my dream before I left college. Then I cancelled our long-distance engagement three weeks later. I knew I had to go out on my own and find me before another found me.

Now I see young people working crazy hours just to go to school and it is inspiring. I worked crazy hours back in the day, as well, to make my portion of college tuition. Summers, only sanctioned by parents; during college I volunteered for the development office and hung coats or gave out name tags and the Director would take us out afterwards. At the event we got extra food they didn’t need in the kitchen that was way better than the cafeteria. Afterwards we used to go to a diner and have french fries and coffee at midnight. Always me and my roommate.

I am so happy to hear of opportunities for young people striving for success and looking to learn to get there. The same year, my mother and I graduated. I was Dean’s List, she was Summa Cum Laude. Go figure. I didn’t have to work hard during college, but I wanted to do so and did in several areas. Dean’s List.

It was not until I got my first “real” job that I worked my heart out. Long hours, lots of brain work, writing and taking care of two other staff people’s jobs to get it done, all while they each got paid three times my salary to “work” two days per week, the lawyer and chief of staff.

Sunday mornings at seven sitting on the floor re-compiling files so I could start fresh on Monday. Pre-286 computer. 750 bills by hand, catching, filing, re-numbering, tracking. And writing reports on each. I had the biggest bill load alone, Ways and Means and Judiciary had staff. All for peanuts. The lifelong education took on a life of its own and it gave me, me.

Moving and moving on take a lot out of a person, I’m no different. But when a young person tells me s/he has an opportunity I am the first to embrace it. You’re leaving us? Congratulations supermarket checker! We’re so happy for you. Yes, I am a cryer at times. But if anyone who knows me professionally has an opportunity to step up the ladder, go for it! We’ll miss you but you’ve a life to live. Someone to marry, kids and schools……

It is heartfelt to know that there are still opportunities for good people. Dee

Words

When I used the “loo” at my Aunt L’s home I had to look up a new word in the dictionary, spell it, define it and use it in a sentence.

A young family member got married last weekend and I think of words. They are used in a marriage ceremony, and every day at home and work and at the grocery store.

My miracle is that we do not need words. He knows when to take my hand, as he did on our first date. He knows what I need, I know what he needs and we do a lot of our public communication without words. To hold hands walking down a sidewalk we don’t even look at each other, just reach out at the same time. I am hoping the same for the newlyweds.

We do speak, but I wonder if we are no longer able to speak due to age or illness can we transfer thoughts to each other. We’re that close. I think we can do it. Whenever he’s home we hold hands and say we love each other every day. Yes, words. They have their place. Thank you Homer, Shakespeare, Austen, poets and wordsmiths everywhere for letting your thoughts inspire me to just take his arm across an icy street without a word or a glance. We just know. And he’ll know when to let me go. Dee

Gravlax

I’ve learned Kottsbullar from my neighbor, Swedish meatballs. Now I want to make gravlax on my own and give them some to taste. Both my next-door neighbors are Swedes. Go figure.

First I have to finish cleaning out the frig so I can place an entire tray in there with weights for 48 hours. And I have to do it when my husband is out of town because he is deathly allergic to fish and can’t even smell it.

I would like to make enough for girls’ night in, movie night, and for our two Swedish neighbors to give me feedback on what I can do better next time. Looking towards salmony-ness soon. Dee

ps When I make hors d’oeuvres for guests if it has nuts, I’ll put a nut on top. Anchovies, same. Fish, roe or something fishy if it’s fish. If it’s a small dinner party I suss out the allergies and dislikes. No broccoli? OK. Larger get-togethers, is’s better to “label” with ingredients. D

Sleeping

My husband came home after two weeks away at work and a family wedding far away. I’d poured him a glass of ice water and our dog was going nuts so after I checked that his plane landed, we went to wait for him while my stew was cooking.

He wanted Dr. Pepper but I gave him water. We both fell asleep, head to head, on our L-shaped sofa and I awakened him at 11:00 and we went to bed, at the dog’s suggestion, request, demand.

I’ve been up for a couple of hours, he likes the view but can’t see it through his eyelids so he didn’t even stop snoring when I awoke and put down the blinds so he, they, could sleep through the morning sun.

After two weeks on the road he is so tired, and being home and sleeping in his own bed is treasured so I want to take care of the dog, let him sleep the morning away and spend a long weekend with him, quiet or about town.

The stew was good, not great. My stove went from too much to too little flame. I’m hesitant to put these pans with silicone handles in the oven even at at 300 or 325. Three hours and it was getting tender. Now I’ve another meal with stew I can cook for another hour, and pappardelle noodles I can cook on the stove. It tastes great, just needs to be pull-apart tender.

I also have good bread, soppressata and cheese to do a picnic. Out in the park, away from the coyotes (yes, they’ve been threatening dogs lately). Packs of them. Not human coyotes, animals who are hungry and looking to ambush dogs. They don’t seem to be afraid of their owners, either, only backing away about 5′. My dog is 80 in people years. I will not subject either of us to that type of threat.

Anyway, my husband didn’t even hear the clanking of the blinds. May they sleep well, peacefully. I know Zoe is happy to have him home. Dee

Kindness and Compassion

While I await my husband’s plane to arrive home (no it is not a private plane) in a few moments I think of the things people do every day to make a day better.

My neighbor took me to the film festival the other day because his wife didn’t feel up to it and asked him to take me.

My husband has been eating restaurant food for weeks so I am cooking his favorite stew.

T, who works for us and always busts my chops, gave me a repreive from keeping me away from my kitchen sink for another 24 hours as he knew my husband was coming home and I needed the sink to make the stew, do dishes, run the dishwasher. He never said anything, nor did I, so I’ll see him on Monday. Or Tuesday. I don’t know.

Every once in a while people suprise us with rare moments of grace and kindness. Savor those moments. Dee

Moving and Stuff

I had ten minutes to clean out underneath my kitchen sink yesterday before the sink fell in and had to be re-glued. The left side has the usual, dish soap, a box of dishwashing detergent, flower food, and two special (empty) wine bottles I’d like to have cut down with labels to use as vases or planters.

The middle is our trash can, away from the dog’s prying nose. Right side is my ersatz tool box (hammer, screwdrivers, picture hangers, moving materials including rolls of really good tape, moving tape dispensers, locks, keys, plus pop-up sponges and plastic scrubbies for non-stick pans). Oh, also cable ties and who knows what else. I cleaned the entire cabinet before the gent who was helping us out with the sink had to get underneath to fix things. My husband’s three tool boxes are in storage so give me a hammer and a and a flat head and Phillips screwdriver and I’m good.

That was when I thought, why do we move? The last move we made was for three months. We stayed three years. It was furnished down to the last cup and spoon and we vowed not to get anything permanent. Yes, we bought great food, I cooked it and we and ate it. Perhaps over the years we each bought ten books, technical, mine cooking and his new computer languages. In the end, we were still able to place all our clothing (oh, we had to add to that for winter weather) and personal items, including the dog and her food and beds, into both cars to relocate. It all fit!

Moving has a purging effect. We do it every few years and I’m only stuck with some really old files because I’m afraid there are old photos, ideas, marriage certificate, car titles and otoher important stuff in there. Under the sink it was organized chaos. When my husband asks for regular tape you’d use for gift wrap, I get it for him from under the sink. I know where everything is.

You take the high road and I’ll take the low road….. old Scottish song about Loch Lomond, the best water in the world, take it from me living in Glasgow. Part of our marriage pact is that he gets whatever I need from up top, and I reach underneath to get tape, pots and pans. I equip every home to fit our reaching abilities. That would be important when we build our forever home.

Moving is a way of getting rid of stuff. I’ve already donated boxes and boxes of clothing and other items to charity. Still we have stuff. Another part of our agreement is no useless stuff. If I collect anything it’s books and art. And piles of paper. Food and my pantry are not part of the equation as they count as perishable and consumable. I do not need tiny figurines made of glass or clay.

A couple of years ago when I purged items, I found some art and made our bedroom a Tuscan retreat. He returned home after months on the road and said “You’re not moving, you’re nesting!” I told him anything I can see, I can pack. Now I collect boxes for everything. I need to at least break them down and take them to storage for later use.

Remember “have gun, will travel?” I have a professional moving tape dispenser and box cutter in the back pocket, ready to go! Purge and go! I love our place and our views but when I look underneath, I find stuff that’s got to go. I know how to pack a box, by now I should have a doctorate in moving. We can live wherever we want so have plotted a map by airport boarding statistics to get non-stop flights. We’re not only movers, we’re planners!

I should become a moving consultant. I mean it. Dad had a rule. Truck is here, unload, I’m going to check out the new job so unpack and have your bedrooms set up and boxes gone by dinner. Bye.

Aah, life. People here, if they move, they marry and move across the street from their parents. We lead a different life based on keeping our heads above water, and rarely get to see our parents or siblings. It’s a fact of life, like the kitchen sink. Cheers! Dee