Tag Archives: weddings


There is a girl who lost a grandfather not too long ago, and a young couple who took their vows yesterday. We wish them every happiness.

My husband was there on our behalf and he said the Bride looked beautiful. Of course she did! The guys were dressed in white shirts and jeans, probably cowboy boots but no hats. Groom added a vest.

My husband said all the gals looked great. Typical. He is a techie and not really good on descriptions of social events and I’m usually there so we can compare notes on the interesting people we met. No, we don’t talk about suits or dresses.

What I like to see is a new generation having faith in a life together, the vows we took 12 years ago. Congratulations!  With all best wishes for bride and groom and families for emotional support over the years. Dee

ps I had to practically run a marathon to gain entry into this family. Cousin’s new husband is sailing in on a wing and a prayer. We have a month to plan his hazing, Probably the worst is … I can’t tell you, it is a quiet mind game. Then we’ll see if he can make it through life with this side of the family.


Sugar and Spice, and Herbs

At lunch time my major concern is that window washers are coming down and there are ropes hanging. Our poor old dog doesn’ know what to do so I’m awaiting their arrival and introducing them as our friends, as I do every year.

I cannot go out or get lunch anywhere until they are below us and friends.

Today my husband went out a new adventure. Part of it is attending a wedding for a young cousin. Brava! We sent her one gift this morning, no, two. I had the opportunity to teach the bride and her cousin cooking classes, two years at Thanksgiving, when she was just a little girl. I heard that she and her future husband  like to cook together.

All I’ll tell you about the first gift is that it includes reference works (how romantic) plus the same spiced nuts I place on Nanny’s table every year for 14 years come next week. The spiced nuts were not sent to the bride, but to her mother, to calm her nerves and know everything will be OK. Don’t stress! Nanny and I are there in spirit for you. Just place the nuts on the table, take a breath.

Of course for Thanksgiving I never would have tried to do pies or cakes. First, I do not bake. Second, you couldn’t imagine the tastes up there on that Thanksgiving table. Forget the table after being satiated by turkey, ham, brisket and numerous side dishes. Feeding 50+ with just desserts, one must use windowsills et all!

I thought a lot of fresh spices and herbs would complete our wedding package so ordered it from Penzey’s this morning and it will arrive before the wedding as well. I remember when the bride’s youngest brother climbed off his mother’s lap and insisted on kissing me goodbye. He’s grown now and would hate to hear that story. I’ll keep it for blackmail!

For the bride and groom come common herbs, chilis and cinnamon sugar, sugar and spice. Congratulations, newlyweds!

In the beginning I  concentrated on two things and knew no-one left much on the kitchen table. I brought my homemade boursin and crackers, plus spiced nuts and just left them on the table. During The Game all the ladies congregated in the Kitchen and I hope I had a part in that. Next year I gave them spinach balls but left that recipe to a new bride in my new family.

Mincemeat tarts, Brussels sprout and cauliflower vegetarian (but rich and sinful) gratin. I don’t remember the rest at the moment, only that the boursin and nuts always are on the kitchen table and after all the good dishes are cleaned and replaced that’s where we go to relax before the next round. Yes, there’s a next round after The Game and it entails plastic cups and paper plates.  That’s why I wanted cousin the MOB to have the nuts on the kitchen table in a bowl, or wherever she wants them. My husband flew them south this morning and will take another flight and car to the wedding.

Sorry I will not be there. I did go off the bride’s gift list but then again, I taught her cooking when she was a little kid and her cousin K said my first year (before marriage) that “Nanny has shoes like that.” Ouch! Love these gals and it makes me feel really old to see one getting married. To Bride and Groom! Dee

Chick Magnets

Here is the tie my husband is forbidden from buying!

Cool tie my husband is not allowed to buy

Chick Magnet Tie

We have been very happy with all the ties we have bought from this company.

Discount code for 15% off sitewide: DEE15

Mr.Rishi who owns The Dark Knot has always been extremely helpful.


That’s something my husband and I talked about a week after we met. We married 14 months later. Oh, we eloped. What we said that first week is that the marriage is more important than the wedding. Our young friends are proving that to be true.

Marriage is about yesterday, nearly 13 years in, on a klutz week, I have them from time to time, every five years or so. I think I broke my near little toe on the wood leg to our sofa and had to get up to ice it again. He brought me an ice pack and a naproxin sodium for pain. Thank you, dearest!

In 2003 we were moving and had the car, the truck was on its way to its new destination and we were at an old Holiday Inn, new name, the round ones. The room was angular. I was up and pacing middle of the night and because of the non-squareness of the room when I stubbed my toe on the desk my husband, in his sleep, said “hurts, doesn’t it.” To this day it’s a joke here and he doesn’t remember saying it. That’s marriage.

People spend tens of thousands for weddings when they should consider their future. I did our wedding planning, flowers, site, dress (rental with tiara and lovely white scarf, hair, makeup, shirt and tie for my groom, lunch for eight and honeymoon) for $2,000. Yes, tell me to get out of here. That includes permits.

My husband and I asked an older couple (married for decades) for a meeting at their home. It was a Tuesday afternoon. They had been very kind to us, me before I met J, for years. I said that we have decided to marry. If you don’t have any plans at noon Saturday, we’d love for you to be there. I called them Mom and Dad.

I asked “Dad” if he would marry us. As a retired Navy Captain I’m sure he thought it would be on a ship, and “Mom” to sign as a witness. He took a moment in the other room (perhaps shed a tear because he has three sons and no daughter to give in marriage). He came out, asked how it would be done and told me he wanted to write the vows.

They were not great on computers so I said I’d type and print the vows for him in caps and double spaced. We found an illegal venue less than 24 hours before the wedding and were in and out of there in 15 minutes to go to my favorite Northern Italian place on the patio for lunch for eight. The chef gave us wedding cake. Then we went home to call our parents.

Yes, that 2K got us one night at a senior’s resort on Rte. 66 (my husband’s choice and it was karaoke night) and two in Vegas courtesy of a concierge who saw my bouquet and told us to come back after lunch and gave us a gorgeous suite on the 33rd floor for $88 per night!

It was an incredible four days planning and executing but worth every minute. We did what we wanted to do. Simple, elegant, and we met each others’ families first. His mother interrogated me for five days. Smart she is, because whenever I tell her that her son is on a five month project that takes over my kitchen work space and is driving me nuts all she says is “I told you.” Yes, she did. Cheers! Dee

ps “Dad” is now interred at Annapolis. Of course we were there. God rest his soul. As his “daughter” I’ve permission to visit any time. I just have to wait a month for a parking permit. Dee

Cooks and Garnishes

I made a perfect steak the other night. I was inside doing baked potatoes and such but seasoned the steaks and my husband did not overcook them. He knows better now that when there’s a wonderful meal on his plate not to douse it in H-P or A-1 sauce.

Come morning when there is a bit of steak left I cook it with his eggs and then he can have sauce with it. I was horrified years ago the first time he asked for sauce.

When I bring something to the table I have tasted it and make sure it is seasoned correctly, which is why I never have salt or pepper on the table. It really hurts my feelings when someone takes a perfectly cooked steak and asks for steak sauce to drown it and lose all the flavor I imparted into that steak.

As for garnishes, forget the parsley “trees” as I asked the butcher for as a kid because I’d never seen a fresh herb before. Only use something that enhances and, at a cocktail party, identifies what is in the dish. My husband is deathly allergic to anything that swims and I failed once to place a little crisscross of salmon over a salmon mousse, only a sprig of dill, and ended up running to get him antihistamines as he brushed his teeth.

If you’ve a pasta dish with cheese, garnish it with that cheese and also basil if basil is in the sauce. When I make a chicken liver mousse with apple and walnuts I place a decorative slice of apple on top with a walnut to make sure those who are allergic to nuts know what is in the dish.

On the slightly crazy side I do know how to make frills of parchment paper. Say I french a rack of lamb leaving only the “lollipop” if I cook it in a hot oven or grill I can make parchment paper “frills” for the tops of the bones. Make them and attach after they cook, while they’re resting.

I always wondered why Julia Child’s turkeys et al always had frills. Perhaps hers were made professionally by food stylists but I can make my own and would love to teach an artistic child to marinate and grill that lamb and while it’s cooking, make parchment frills to surprise his/her parents at dinner.

No foams. No immersion circulators. No room in my kitchen and I’ll stick to old school. We just thought outside the box and sent a friend who got married this weekend a key set of my favorite kitchen tools. They are purposeful but many cooks will not have them so we hope they appreciate the care we put into these varied selections. Congratulations and best wishes, you two! Cheers, Dee

Marriage, Ladies?

OK, so Prince Charming has arrived at your door in full armor on his white steed. With an engagement ring. You tearily say yes while outfitting yourself in full bride-zilla mode. This is YOUR day, darn it, and everyone needs to follow your rules from the dress to the decor to the food and band.

I must say that marriage is about a lifetime commitment, not a day in the life of a diva. I told that to my husband the first or eleventeen dates and even said no to an engagement ring and got us matching gold bands for our elopement.

Five years later I was asked to have our wedding date and my birthday engraved inside my husband’s ring. On our tenth, seconds before he walked in the door I looked it up and it’s the Tin anniversary so made myself a quick alien aluminum foil hat (he’s a physics and computer geek) for a surprise.

This Q&A section is sponsored by married women, one opinionated wife, anyway, otherwise write in:

* * *

Question: “Why bother making the bed? I’m only going to work, eat dinner and fall back into it?”

Answer: “Because my mother made me.”

Question: “Why even wash or fold laundry?”

Answer: “Because I’m not sending your underwear and socks out to the drycleaners. And your clean pile/dirty pile in your man cave really didn’t work out as you spent 45 minutes every morning trying to find socks that matched.”

Question: “Why even make dinner? We can go out.”

Answer: “Didn’t you say that was the best meal you ever had the other day? I made it.”

Question in mind from wife: “Do I look fat in this?”

Answer, again in brain from wife: “Don’t go there. Bad, bad place.”

Question from wife: “The dog usually goes out at 6:30 a.m. You were awake and on your computer. Why didn’t you take her?”

Answer from husband: “She didn’t ask.”

Question from husband: Why do we spend so much to live here?

Answer: “Because I refuse to live in the dark with only individually wrapped string cheese in the frig and string cheese wrappers on the carpet between the frig and your computer.”

Question from Man Cave Neighbor: “Why did you move back?”

Answer from soon-to-be husband: “Her.”

Aww, shucks. I love you, dear. Love that you get the high stuff from the cabinets and I rummage around under the kitchen sink for whatever you need.

One thing I must say is that except for twice in over 11 years he does put the toilet seat down. Props for that, gals. He loves me and our dog, and our families. He’s a keeper, no matter what he says, and no matter that the dog knows to come to me when she needs something. I’ve always spoken dog, it’s taken some time to learn to speak husband! Cheers and write in, Dee