Tag Archives: change

Changing Things Up

Posted on February 11, 2016 | Leave a comment

Yes, we move from time to time. We’ve been married over 13 years now and see things on the horizon.

I get to see the little things. I lived on my own for years so never had to think of these little things, like making dinner for two, feeding and walking a dog and keeping certain things separate. Suitcases. I used to be able to pack for us in less than 12 minutes. After 14 years he packs himself (first time for everything) and I stay out of his way. Of course all his shirts, pants, socks et al are clean and folded in his closet. Magic!

Most dishes go in the dishwasher so that’s all the same. Some things are blue/purple for him and red/pink for me, like toothbrushes. We can tell our glasses apart (I hate Dr. Pepper) and I don’t wear contacts.

Then it comes to cell phones. Mine was eight years old and even my bank would not allow me access. Years ago I got a bright pink case because we had the same phone back then (he drowned one fly-fishing then progressed several times) and I didn’t want him to take mine to work and have my list of contacts instead of who he needed to contact for work.

Now we’ve the newest iPhone on the planet and it’s huge and heavy and I don’t text and don’t know how to use the darn thing. I don’t care. I only call and answer calls. We both got glass and he has a hard case because he keeps his phone in his pocket and drops it on concrete a lot. I got a clear case with a rose gold back on my phone so he’ll never board a flight without his phone or contact list. I keep mine connected in the kitchen (away from water) and in my purse when on the road.

Newlyweds, forget about what the bridal magazines are trying to sell you. You will not be reading the Sunday paper and doing the crossword on the sofa. You will be worrying about where to put Great Aunt Linda’s china and taking care of your husband when his allergies kick in. Then you’ll have kids, at least a dog. Walks, soccer, school, runny noses. Whatever. Just remember when you take out Fido, you pick up and safely transport the poop to an approved receptacle. I am happily married to a very smart man, and am glad that you read this blog. Cheers! Dee

ps Ask me about the one fly-fishing trip another time……

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Eyes Wide Open

Posted on September 8, 2015 | Leave a comment

Yes, I got up early and before seven I peeked in to see the dog. I motioned her to come to me and she was looking at me but not seeing me because she was sound asleep, eyes wide open. Freaky.

There are thunderstorms going on but no rain yet, thunder is getting louder by the minute but she wants her beauty sleep!

As I wait for Zoe to come see me to go out then get fed, we said goodbye to a work friend. We’re glad to know him and he’s as old-school as me, writing a note thanking us for all we’ve done. He’s done more for us. He’s an author and I’ll be telling you about his new book. No, not selling it. This is not a monetized site.

Oh, it just started pouring rain. Zoe’s not going to like this but she should have awakened a half-hour ago. Darn. We’re supposed to have thunderstorms all day. She hates involuntary wetness but loves baths. By me, of course with our own system. My husband does 20 minutes of hard bathing. I do five minutes of dog massage. Guess who she loves? We’ll let you hang on that while I wake her and do the “two minute pee.” Here’s to our Best Friends, Dee

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Making Things Happen

Posted on July 3, 2015 | 1 comment

Working for government is not a bad thing. It got me a start. Didn’t pay much and I got out of it a few years later.

What it did teach me is how people think. As a kid I was smart and emotional. Emotion has a small role in government when you want to write a piece of legislation that could have changed the world and a big company came in at the last minute and seized their day. Yes, after the agreement and subsequent denial that night I did lose my dinner in the lavatory. Two years of work down the drain.

I know how elected officials think, about what their staff wants, and what the bureaucrats want and how to get what I want. I don’t give anyone money, just cheer, cajole, pester and VOTE until they don’t want me to write or call anymore.

Yes, I pick up dog poop. I encourage others to do so as well by carrying extra bags. I call when there is a crosswalk I initiated two years ago whose paint has faded so much that it is useless. No-one ever stopped anyway so I’ve asked for a sign in the middle that says it’s state law to stop.

Encouraging positive legislation that helps people is our duty, as voters. Whether it’s your local city council person or state or federal legislator this is your job as a citizen. Determine what matters to you, think it out and write or call in to say a kid died because there was no stop sign. Hopefully that is not the case. Look up representatives by your zip code. We pay them. They work for us. Dee

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Liking

Posted on July 1, 2015 | Leave a comment

This is what I like:

“I want to talk about this recipe Friday, my wife would LOVE it!” Signed J., an author.

I love that his wife would enjoy that recipe. I only want to add to pantries and recipe collections. Also politics and rantings about legislative nonsense. That is me and all anyone will get from a happily married woman way away from family.

A few years ago I received a 3/5 card box I made made 40 years ago and kept for mother’s memory. It included a lot of eggplant that I love, especially for Moussaka which it inspired and my husband hates.

There are so many things to love in life, like our dog Zoe wanting to be lifted to the bed because she has no hips. Taking care of them is not a chore, it is a duty, my duty. My duty, my pleasure, my job. I love them so much. Cheers, Dee

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Routine

Posted on May 27, 2015 | Leave a comment

I’m certain you know that herding dogs crave routine. I took Zoe in the back seat to bring my husband to work one hot morning down south years ago and she wanted to do it every day.

As soon as he said goodbye and got out to cross the street, next to the bus enclosure, Zoe would hop into the passenger seat and sit down as if she was a person. Everyone at the bus stop laughed. Every day. “My goodness! She looks human!”

Sometimes I crave routine because it’s easy, often I want something challenging. I often do that through writing and my food. We have had off-routine for some time now as my husband has been doing challenging things for himself. My world was turned upside down but he doesn’t know that.

If you read an earlier post my trackball mouse that helps me with my arthritis broke the other day. Only the scroller broke and I use that a lot so he installed another just for scrolling. Yesterday we received the new one which is similar. He installed it last night and I’m dealing with the variabilities. I’ve saved the old one as it may be fixed and sold on eBay for $600 (we bought it for $35) because they’re not made anymore. The trackball is smaller and I’m overshooting or undershooting this morning so please bear with me if I err.

Routine. Going between two computer mice drove me nuts but what was even worse is that after two days I started to get used to it!! It’s scary what the human mind can do. Thank goodness I’m getting that routine back.

This morning was horrible. I will not cook until my kitchen is clean. I only had a few hand-wash dishes from dinner. Dinner was great, chicken wings in my famous marinade/sauce, roasted red potatoes with olive oil, s&p and thyme. Spring greens salad with Campari tomatoes and my husband’s routine, ranch dressing. I like to make variable vinaigrettes but he loves his ranch dressing.

So I got a nose bleed after dinner and didn’t finish the hand-wash dishes until this morning. An alarm was set. I took out the dog and fed her. My husband, when in town, usually sits at the kitchen counter/bar on a nice stool and I feed him.

Eggs over medium, bacon, two strips, toast with jam that will not stain his dress shirt. Orange juice, herbal tea, and an allergy pill. He was in my kitchen this morning messing me up. We are definitely not back to “routine.” Not yet.

I need to pick up my game and be there for my family. The research we’ve done has been helpful but my breakfast game is about ten minutes off. Will work to serve. Dee

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To Better Times

Posted on April 17, 2015 | 2 comments

My husband’s flight is scheduled to come in 1/2 hour early tonight. That’s for now. He should be home by 10:00, 10:30.

Everything is a scramble here as they’ve been resurfacing/eliminating damaging calcium deposit leaks that ruin the paint of our cars. It ruined mine and they wish to fix it. First there was valet service. Now we’re out in the open and have a shuttle bus. Most of the valets treated me well, as did the shuttle driver after I finally found out where to park my car. Our vehicles are viewable with binoculars. If there is actually security there our greatest danger may be bird poop from the seagulls, ducks and geese.

So, my husband has found a way to actually be home for an entire two-day weekend, beginning next week. I may be able to cook dinner three nights and his favorite breakfasts for two days (cereal Monday morning) and I’ll try to get everything done here so he can relax and perhaps walk the dog once or twice.

For someone who dislikes enforced change I espouse it at work and throughout life. Dog Zoe has taught me much (I trained her) over the past 11 years. I am a creature of habit. If I desire to change my job or city I’ll do it. Tell me to do it, as my family did many times, and I’ll dig in my heels, especially if there is no rational reason to do so.

I do what my dog tells me. She’s old so when she wants to go out I take her right away, even at 2:00 a.m. When she wants something, that’s different. I can usually discern between the two. Sometimes she only wants to get up on the couch or have her precious toy.

A dinner for four and cooking lesson is on deck for tomorrow. Perhaps six, no way to know. I’ll be prepared. I’m teaching Texas Chili a la Lady Bird Johnson 1962 at hers and LBJ’s Pedernales Ranch for 5,000 guests including President Kennedy.

I’m changing up the recipe once again roasting a poblano and a couple of finger chilis (don’t know what the Scoville scale will say on the latter). Now I have to finish cleaning up the house, the dog and finally, me. Have a great weekend! Dee

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Nonchalant

Posted on February 24, 2015 | Leave a comment

I don’t believe the dictionary, instead I believe my dog. She’s sleeping behind me, never more than two feet away, but never touching unless she wishes to do so. Her photo should be next to the word “nonchalant” except she’s pretending, otherwise she wouldn’t always stay two feet from me.

The other morning around 5:00 she aligned her spine against mine on our bed, to assure I would not move without her knowing about it. She hasn’t done that for a couple of years, but things are different with my husband away on business.

Nonchalant is definitely the word of the day. OED calm, relaxed. I might think of a lady sure of herself at Ascot, with the best hat. Sean Connery as Bond, James Bond. Or Meryl Streep in any movie.

Who doesn’t care about the maelstrom surrounding ones lives? I’ve done change all my life as a kid, at work, in life. I can’t tell you how many because you won’t believe me. I can say that most were very good changes since my birth but change does take its toll.

My word is inured, not nonchalant. I had a new school, new friends and was pulled out, even in high school. Luckily I got to spend four years at the same college. So much for nonchalance. Cheers, Dee

ps My brother and I have agreed to make even a better Cassoulet than I did for our father 25 years ago. It will be a project, lasting days or a week, to better what Dad once called the best meal of his life.

My life has been inspired, I’ve learned, loved, of course lost a great deal. I’ve never shied away, at least for 20 years, from controversy. There is so much controversy about this French dish that I lost my book, Simca’s Cuisine that kept me warm on cold winter nights on my unpaid culinary apprenticeship.

I’ve found the long-lost book, on Amazon, that is the dish to give to my father. Back then, it was my best friend as I was living in an unheated cabin on a mattress just to cook. We’ll fly in and cook, that’s the plan. D

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Chautauqua Amphitheater

Posted on December 7, 2014 | 1 comment

I haven’t seen it in a few years, but in my college years it was a scary adventure. Steps to the choir loft, shaky ladder upstairs, then two boards with no safety net 100 feet off the floor to the rickety sound booth.

Several people were around to change that, including donors, the board and my father, the new president. We sneaked in, college worker kids, to see the new setup, cool sound and light booth with safe access.

Now the story is tearing the entire thing down or renovating it. I’m hearing a lot from both sides and hear it from the side of safety and preservation. It should be a national landmark for the speeches that have been given there.

It is a venue in which I performed at age seven in the State choir competition, we sang Panis Angelicus and came in 2nd, and I’m still in touch with that grade school music teacher, Mrs. P.

I’ve mixed thoughts especially after meeting old friends last week. A week before that I received an e-mail with the old joke “How many Chautauquans does it take to change a light bulb? “Change?”

Yes, change. Many of us have been instruments of change over many years, me included. If one can preserve historic Victorian structures over the years in a pristine manner, fine. If they sag a foot and need an $8 million dollar renovation (many of them)  because of deferred maintenance that’s another issue that must be addressed for safety.

I believe the boards should be saved, in an appropriate manner, and starting with the last standing at Old First Night, first the descendants of Miller and Vincent, the founders and families with multiple generations.

Truth-telling, I’d build a house with it and wouldn’t even care that it was yellow. I walked, jogged or drove by it and caught snippets of a performance or lecture so many times during my work, before cell phone cameras that I never got enough photos of it. It will be remembered and I don’t know the plans but hope its spirit will be kept, and the entirety missed as someone knew 30, 50 or 80 years ago.

No, I don’t know the plans for it, only that what was done in the early 1980’s to shore up the roof by a foot and make it safe (and paint it, as Mark Russell said, echoed by a flautist, trumpeter and tuba artist all playing “Flight of the Bumblebee” in competition for the shortest version, to get the Amp painted.)

Some things change, some stay the same. It is wonderful to see my cornerstones of that venerable institution. In the meantime, ask before you change any light bulbs. Cheers! Three taps. Dee

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Salt

Posted on February 2, 2014 | Leave a comment

Apparently salt does not melt snow below 15 degrees. Then they have to add chemicals. I took our dog around the block this morning and she chose which paw to put up in unusual pain and kept switching.

Our town likes to salt, not plow, real snow. Zoe likes to eat snow but only the fresh stuff. So I took her out and since she was hurt, left her with my husband and put on my real winter boots, probably a pound apiece. Thanks Doug! He sold us clothes, mostly for my husband, in the Rockies.

I went to the local coffee shop for us and got a few “Cowboy Cookies” to help the ice fishers get through the day and keep fed and warm. I couldn’t find a way to them on foot. So I put them in the freezer and will take them out and we’ll drive them down in the morning.

Anywhere I live, I find things that need to be done and try to do them while I’m there. This morning I and the dog walked by a cyclist with a winter bike with really wide tires coming up the hill over snow and ice. He got a “hurrah” and “well done!” This past week we’ve met two dogs who are newly certified therapy dogs for local hospitals.

They won’t accept my dog because she eats raw food. I’m not going to change her diet at age ten and think she makes enough people happy every day just being herself. Everyone knows Zoe, even if they forget my name.

I got three stop signs and a crosswalk in a year. We do what we can do and always try to make a difference. Make a difference in your community, Dee

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Agents of Change

Posted on September 6, 2012 | Leave a comment

Hello, I’m Deputy Director Dee from the DAC. Yes, the Department of Agents of Change. I can’t tell you who our director is because if I did, I’d have to kill you.

Seriously, while my husband is a nerd and I majored in what he calls a “soft skills” area of  Sociology/Psychology we are both Agents of Change.

We are brought in by organizations who think they want change. Most do not. It is a dance we do that rivals the Indianapolis City Ballet’s annual Gala. Did you get that, R, J and K? September 8th. Be there.

Many corporate and non-profit organizations know they need to change missions, mindsets, systems but few have the wherewithal to see it through.

Change is painful. It forces one to look at one’s failings and move forward. Perhaps it’s easier for me because of my background. We moved a lot, my father headed several major institutions to create change and I believe in my own philosophy of change that he influenced. Age and wisdom have entered the fray. Hey, he’s 81 and just opened a restaurant and I’m not going in that direction even given the title to this blog.

My husband of nearly ten years believes in change for other reasons. He writes code I could never understand but believes in quality work, honesty and mentoring for change. Hope I put that right, as your alarm goes off to start the day, honey.

As agents of change, when a company or non-profit decides not to change, we’re the first to go. Afterwards, they limp along and may go down as well or continue to slide into mediocrity and beyond.

It is exhilarating when the flame burns, and devastating finding out and knowing that the client never wanted to change in the first place.  This is what we live for. I’ve stayed away from it for a while but when I’m in it, I’m a pistol!

Oh no, now I’ll have organizations all over town recruiting my services! Perhaps for money. Wouldn’t that be grand. Cheers! Dee

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