A New Superhero

Like The Blue Raja or The Shoveler, we have a new Superhero.

She is The Sleeper. She can awaken in an instant to bark at any sound but is capable of sleeping 2o hours per day. Yes, she is a dog, our dog.

An 11 year-old Aussie mix, she had a troubled youth, born into squalor and losing both her hips before she was a year old, she was determined to sleep her way to victory. Luckily we found this talented girl when she was five weeks old at a shelter, adopted her and knew she would be a Superhero.

While asleep she chases criminals like squirrels, mean cats and bunnies. Her twitching and REM sleep lets us know she’s on the job.

I’ve never seen her Superhero outfit as I don’t want to ask about her extracurricular activities. I just know that when we’re asleep, she is fighting crime. I know she’s got an eye on a local turkey who somehow gets pardoned every Thanksgiving. That deserves further investigation.

As for the two mice in another state, the gun just went off. Willy-nilly. Snow was on the ground, they came out of their hideout and she was a rookie back then. Statute of limitations is over. Internal Affairs cleared her for duty.

There is an ongoing investigation, suspended for now because she’s miles away. He’s called Ermine the Vermin. He lived under a hot tub and poached his prey in a neighbor’s hot tub. How’s that for a opportunistic serial killer, a stoat. He rubbed it in her face by running back and forth outside a sliding door.

His fur may be on Queen Elizabeth II’s ceremonial robes, however, but she will have to go to the Palace to complete the investigation.

Sad to say, but our Superhero would like to retire at age 80 and spend time with her family. She’s fine and healthy but if a new Superhero would like to come to the fore, she would be happy to train/vet that new dog or cat. Yes, she likes cats.

Hope you’re having a great weekend! Dee