Being ‘haved

When my sister and I went to tell Mom on our little brother he’d run to see her first and say “Mommy, I’m not being haved.” And she’d tell him what a sweet young boy he was and we’d get extra chores.

His other infamous remark was “Who turned on the dark?” Leave it to him to see everything from another point of view. I do so as well and love my little brother even though he’s fifty now.

This little guest dog has become a diva. She got me up at 6 a.m. jumping on me, grabbing my arm and licking my hair, and we went out five times before 1 p.m. then she pooped all over my bedroom carpet. She wants to play with me, not Zoe our old dog and makes strange sounds.

After noon I told her she might be one Queen Bee, but I am Queen Dee, owner of this land and the power that is. It was a one-sided conversation mostly of “NO” but she hasn’t bothered me since and is sleeping on my pillows. All is well in the land at the moment.

I’m making myself steak and mashed potatoes and sauteed kale and garlic (dinosaur kale or cavolo nero in Italian) for dinner. She puts her nose on my plate. That’s something Queen Dee has not allowed and will not allow, ever.

This demure, beautiful, peaceful, courteous creature has become a monster and if I need to get out a crate, I will crate her. All Hail Queen Dee! After I feed them and take them out it’s my turn to eat. When one has an old herder one must stick to routine….. Dee


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