Zoe, You’re Fired

Not as first dog. But as an alarm clock your proficiency is down the toilet. I had a dream that it was 6:00 in the morning and I had to get up. It was 9:00 and you were sleeping on my husband’s pillow, snoring away.

I’m not angry at you. You missed Daddy for a few days, I know, as did I. I even realized that it’s not me that makes our hipless wonderdog go off the bed at night, it’s him. Touch her and she goes. Then, two hours later she begs to be lifted up again. No hips.

But as an alarm clock, you put in a dismal performance even though I left the shades up and the sun streamed in at 5:00 you didn’t even ask me to go out! I’m the Mom, and need to know these things and to have you on Jim’s pillow snoring away at 9:00 is disconcerting.

Zoe, as an alarm clock, you’re fired. As a dog, be ready to go out at 6:30 in the morning. Dad’s back and that’s when his iPhone alarm goes off. Disciplinarian and Food Wench Mom, Dee