Tag Archives: society

Men and Dogs

Last week my issue to solve was that of a utilities billing error that was rendered 100% in our favor and it didn’t cost us a cent, except 18 phone calls/emails and much research. That doesn’t cost a thing. I’m a wife so my time is not billable.

In this post in no way do I assume that men and dogs are incompatible. Certain dogs are bred in certain neighborhoods to scare people. Many other dogs are loving family companions and that is my goal.

We currently live in a tower. This evening, I was in the lobby taking my 31 lb. Australian Shepherd dog mix out for a walk. A group of people walked by, four couples. The men went to the other side of the lobby, the women came by my and another woman’s dog and said hello and one petted Zoe.

When we got outside they were awaiting transportation and I picked up Zoe, who would let a 2 year-old steal food from her bowl and just look up at me with sad eyes. The men recoiled, one woman petted her and asked her name, which is the same as her dog. One of the men said “She’s not like the dogs in my neighborhood.” He reached out and petted her back while I was holding her.

This is only part perception, mostly reality. If Maddie’s Fund and ASPCA and the Humane Society want to really stop animal abuse and irresponsible breeding and dog fighting rings our human culture must change. Not just for the dogs, for the people. Just as our business model is, you do what you do to go out of business and have people fend for themselves.

Twenty years ago one of the first programs to shelter dogs from abuse was a beacon to me as a behaviorist and humanitarian (petarian?) as they took in animals and held them without threat of euthanasia where the spouse/children were abused and in an anonymous shelter. They knew that abusers start on small things (pets) and graduate to children and spouses.

I would go a step further and allow families in domestic violence shelters to keep their dog or cat or fish as a symbol of family stability during a crisis. In hurricane Katrina no pets were allowed to be saved and even the inept government rescue agencies have changed that policy, so should domestic violence shelters.

Getting the abusers off the streets is paramount, but education is the key. One does not need to breed aggressive dogs to fight each other or attack humans in order to gain dominance in society.

How can we do it? Unless I was Mother Teresa (I’m not) as an old white lady there’s no way I can go into gang neighborhoods. As an engineer my husband does not like top-down solutions and would rather create from the ground up.

That’s how this must be done. I once read a story of a gang neighborhood with regular drive-by shootings into homes. The ladies installed speakers and played opera music very loudly and the gangsters left. If I could find these ladies, we’d have a solution today. Cheers, let’s hear your solutions, Dee

ps Yes stop drugs, gangs, cock fighting, dog fights, animal abuse, child abuse, spousal abuse on a continuum. If we don’t nip it in the bud, we end up with people who hold girls for years aka A. Castro. Up the ante in jail time for animal abusers and you’ll have your people abusers at bay. Case closed.

Love and Compassion

I didn’t dig deep into the Portman story. Yes, he was presented with a dilemma for a Conservative Republican in that his son is gay, and two years after the fact, when states are trying to make gay marriage legal, he finally jumped on the bandwagon. Of course, a candidate has to rally votes for the next election.

But I’m not here to give him press attention. Gays have been in the closet for so many years and that is sad. In the past hundreds of years they would have just gotten married and had kids, and slept in the single beds the TV Ricky and Lucy or Laura and Rob Petrie didn’t share. Nothing about those folks, sorry.

With the rights epidemic (yes, I worked on it for jobs and apartments in NYC decades ago) going on, I thought everything was going well. Then came AIDS, and more stigma. Or stigmata.

For every person struck down by AIDS, I send my love to their families and friends. For the Federal government to fail to give research funds for this issue is a crime against the American people.

Yesterday, marriage meant a commitment. Now it means access to a hospital room where only family is admitted, health insurance, and the right to make life decisions, be executors of a will and keep the house without inheritance taxes.

The gay couples I know and love deserve to be treated as human beings with all of the c**p that we all deal with but not more because of their sexual orientation.

I love my brothers and sisters who have taken another path. I see bonds there that are as strong or stronger than what my husband and I have in our heterosexual marriage.

To talk of the Bible and love and compassion, I think few of us have either for any human beings, including our families and friends. If we did, we wouldn’t be at war.

People here purposely close the elevator door on us so they don’t have to ever meet us. What kind of neighborhood is that? Dee