We hear the lifetime-bonded pair of Greater Sandhill Cranes as they returned two weeks ago and see the preening of their feathers turn them rust-colored again. They’re blue-grey when they arrive to nest from NM, and the iron-rich soil here in UT makes them rusty red. They mate at age two and bond for life. Last year, our first year out here, we watched a pair raise a “colt” beginning early April and leaving in October. Yes, they mate for life and are back and making wonderful prehistoric sounds that carry for at least a mile.
So what’s the hitch with the Geek on Millionaire Matchmaker. I made it a point to see this recent episode because I’m married to a geek. Both the millionaire and my successful husband are, in my mind “high-functioning” socially. My husband said he was always attracted to nurturers (like teachers) or artsy-types. It makes sense because he uses his brain differently than I do in terms of work, then add in the basic male-female stereotypes.
I’m a smart feminist who is married later in life (about Patti time) and cares for a husband, home and dog and has a blog. Where did the years go?
Jim and I met in La Jolla. The first time we danced around marriage, about two weeks into the relationship, we talked about marriage being the point, not one perfect wedding day (we eloped 16 months later). He is a geek whose religion prohibits dancing but he taught me to Texas Two-Step in his closet in week three of dating. He was dot-bombed and had to move home and I was at his place to help him pack.
Four weeks later he moved back, a 3,000 mile round-trip and actually told a neighbor he moved back to take this new “safe” job because of his girl. So we spent the next year getting to know each other, and meeting parents.
This is for the geeks out there who think you’ll never get the girl. Do something outside your comfort zone like whitewater rafting or taking up a musical instrument just so you have something to talk about. I’m not dealing with the money thing at all, only geek dating in the upper-echelon work world.
Forget most models. Think about your future wife and the mother of your children. Most importantly, find someone who cares about you for who you are, you’re interested in, and a person you can have conversations with until the end of your life.
We eloped, but are now married over seven years and he just called from the grocery store because he has to have horseradish in his mayonnaise. And he insisted on bringing the dog because she loves riding in the car. He talks physics and other lessons on long car trips and while a lot of stuff is rote after nearly 10 years together having a person who can think and talk and cook for the breakfast table works for him.
As for Jim, he always challenges me. For a girl who tried to hide intelligence in school and got good grades, I went out with a few dumb guys. I finally found a few smart ones, one that’s a keeper. I look forward to cooking breakfast for him for many years. Cheers, Dee
Cooking with Dee 