“I’ll walk in the rain by your side, I’ll cling to the warmth of your hand. I’ll do anything to help you understand I love you more than anybody can…”
Your hand took mine out of a lovely silver car 13 years ago. The song is by Peter, Paul and Mary of course. You never let go. We never let go.
Dearest husband and Zoe’s “dogfather,” we love you and hope to see you again soon. Dee
Today I received the most extraordinary compliment. We have security guards downstairs at night and the head guard, after Zoe did her two-second business, talked about how smart she was and asked me to get the game to show the other guard.
I left her with him and ran upstairs to get Zanie’s pizza puzzle. She’s had it for a few months, plays it perhaps once a week and has gone from four minutes to 45 seconds to remove six wooden pegs and three wooden sliders to get a treat underneath. The new guard placed it on the carpet for her to tackle. A couple had just received a gate to keep their dog in their bathroom and they stayed to watch. Zoe also turned around several times and rolled over twice. She was in her element and is sleeping by me now.
The head guy talked about my dear husband and how smart he is and how he looks up to him. Apparently both he and Zoe are smart. But then I got the best compliment, even though I’m smart in a different way from hubby and dog.
Head guy D said I was the first person here to ever say hello and treat him like a human being. As far as I’m concerned we’re all born, live and die. Some have told me to treat people who make less money than us like trash. I disagree. I treat all people well and hopefully I’ll be treated well in return. Trust until that trust is broken by ill will or cheating or lying.
D told me and his cohort I was a nice lady, and that also my chili is very good. Apparently many residents do not treat the staff with respect. I do. I even went out to trim the community herb garden before an event today. It’s looking great (my idea) and I only had to snip a few flowers from the oregano to keep it from bolting too soon as winter is on its snowy and icy way.
Always, thanks for reading and contributing. I’ve “met” some good friends here on the blog and introduced some to each other. Yes, I am smart as well. Dee
My husband came to visit from a new job far away, for thirty hours during Labor Day weekend. Our dog Zoe would have nothing to do with him as he’d been gone a few weeks. He got in at 1 a.m. so it took until morning (Zoe wants her beauty sleep) but the “fun guy” was back playing ball with her and she was happy.
The other night I got a nosebleed and had to take apart, wash and put back every piece of bedding after waiting overnight for sheets and everything to dry. I got out two soft blankets and placed them on the L-shaped sofa and that’s where Zoe and I slept. She was not pleased with me all night for that, jumping up and down and clicking on the wood floors, until I took her out early this morning and fed her then put the bed back together after everything was dry. She’s happy now.
She only squeaks the ball when I get it down for her. She fetches it for my husband, and squeaks. It is an indestructible toy he “invented” and her first lasted ten years until the materials finally deteriorated due to age. That’s pretty good for a dog who can eviscerate a stuffed animal or tennis ball in 60 seconds.
Years ago when my youngest sister was 1-2, Dad went away every Tuesday for meetings across the state and returned Thursday night. She would cry when he returned as if she did not remember him, then hug him before he left. As a young girl I was somewhat responsible for her care and it bothered me because I knew the days and that he’d return. She was too young to know that.
Dogs remember things and people as well. My first dog always remembered people in uniform because her deputy sheriff owner would beat her. She was also afraid of children because she was left out in the sheriff’s yard and neighborhood kids threw rocks at her. That all changed when she came home with me. I’d like to think that living indoors in a good home with daily training and trust allowed her to let her the past be the past. She certainly showed it in our neighborhood and they loved her for it, military, children, dogs and their owners. Cheers! Dee
Our Zoe is nearly 11 years old now. We got her from the shelter at six weeks. I took her out eight times a day but she was always a sleeper and even as a young pup she could easily sleep from 11 p.m. to 6 a.m. Now as an old lady she jumps off the bed when the sun begins to come up and crawls underneath it, under my pillow so I can’t go anywhere without her knowing. Herder, I love and hate it at the same time, hate it when she serpentines in front of me when I have a load of laundry in my arms to fold!
At nine weeks of age we went to see two of my husband’s college buddies, brothers. We took Zoe and their parents were kind enough to take her while we went out to dinner. We returned and there were towels all over the house. Zoe did not fall into their pool. She got a running start and dove in! Luckily she learned how to swim, swam to the other side and they fished her out. Oops.
Then there was Zeus. We went to Easter that same weekend at the vet who ended up taking out her hips a few months later. Val had many animals, horses, goats, dogs, cats and others. After dinner she gave all the hard-boiled and decorated Easter eggs to the dogs. Zoe got right in there. Zeus, the Alpha dog said NO! She went running. She was probably always Beta but certainly was after that day. When her hips went bad she’d just lay on the hill, tummy up, and no other dog ever disturbed her, I think it’s her kind and happy spirit that kept her from evisceration.
When her hips went bad at five months I looked into treatments. FHNO was the best option (femoral head and neck ostectomy) so we had Val do the surgeries at six and nine months of age as research showed doing the surgeries before 10 months led to an 80% chance of normality. There were no titanium hips available for 25 lb. dogs because they’re not supposed to get severe hip dysplasia (Val said it was the worst case she’d ever seen) so she grew her own hips from cartilage and has been very happy and healthy for over ten years. Still cow-hocked, but happy.
Zoe can corner around a tree faster than any big dog. And she plays outfield and gets the ball first. Smart gal, our Zoe. She now has a complicated game that requires removing wooden pegs and moving sliders to get treats. In a month and 7-8 trials what took her four minutes now takes 45 seconds. Then it’s my turn to fetch, under the sofa and coffee table for pegs to put up for the next time.
Val’s son had a guinea pig in a cage in his room back then. I was downstairs and heard the guinea pig and remarked that I never heard one talk before. Turns out her son opened the cage and Zoe tried to kill it, it was shrieking. After all that we were actually invited to stay other times. Zoe got it back, though. I’d take her out at six in the morning and the animals thought Val was up and they were about to be fed. Pork Chop, a 1,500 lb. cow and Val’s favorite horse followed us. The ground shook and Zoe was so freaked out she couldn’t do her business!
Oh, Pork Chop is buried on the property. Only fitting. Zoe is known around town. People don’t know my name but they know hers. Look, it’s Zoe! She has made many children happy. She even likes cats, one has even come to call for her, sleeping in front of our door because she knew our puppy walk schedule and with us, the brute squad, she could keep away from the mockingbirds.
Sometimes I wonder what Zoe is dreaming when she’s in REM sleep. Yes, people tell us dogs don’t dream, and that they can never remember anything after 45 minutes. WRONG! She runs in her sleep, after squirrels or mice, and she always goes to my father-in-law’s personal spot on the sofa to watch for him on the four-wheeler coming back from feeding the cattle, even if she hasn’t been there for a few years.
All y’all have a great day, Dee
Years ago my neighbor moved a few doors away. She stopped talking to me after we’d been friends for years and we had even rescued George the cat and re-homed him. She said I lied to her. I never did.
A couple of years after she moved and we were not in touch, it was April 2001. Her dog Osa dragged her to my house. I petted her and she died the next day. Osita the little bear needed to say goodbye to Aunt Dee. I brought over a blue vase with yellow flowers. We talked and my neighbor said she didn’t like the guy I was dating or what I was doing with my life, plus that I never lied.
A month later my dog bled out on my front lawn. A tile guy from down the street helped me lift her into my Jeep to take her to the vet a couple of miles south. The vet said she needed to be put down. I stayed with her through a very difficult dying process and afterwards was proved right. She now has a memorial tree in her park that I can see on Google Earth and ashes are in her teddy bear (Osa) that I keep with me always.
The next day my old neighbor stopped by with a blue vase filled with yellow flowers and we were friends again.
* * *
I tell you this because there’s a therapy dog for hospital work here who is up on all her shots and just got kennel cough, which will keep her out of therapy and daycare for weeks. Because of Osa and my first and current dog, I’d like to help.
The first dog with the memorial tree got kennel cough once and she had the bordatella vaccine at the time as well. Keeping her away from her park and friends for five weeks was not fun for either of us. Our friends and the kids and parents were disappointed as well. The kids would yell her name and rush out of the tot lot to pet her, so much for an abused shelter dog afraid of men and children. I don’t like to think that I worked wonders. She was my partner in her rehabilitation to the first and only normal life she’d ever known.
I think I’ll never live without a dog. Dogs keep me out and walking and meeting others. A recent neighbor’s dog died a few weeks ago. I neglected to bring him a blue vase and yellow flowers. My dog and I did, however, water one of Jake’s favorite trees in the park across the street and said a prayer. When we get together again, I’ll bring the blue vase and yellow flowers and tell him the story. Cheers, hug your dog (or cat), Dee
ps I wrote this because of the neighbor’s dog with kennel cough. I took one of the first joint Red Cross/Humane Society rescue courses years ago and looked up the manual for kennel cough, get to a vet for treatment. In it I found a delinquency notice for failure to pay my dog’s license fee with escalating penalties. This is five months after the vet notified the county that she was dead. I just wrote DEAD and the name of the Vet and never heard from them again. Just watch out for these actions and let them know the bad news. Good news are memories, a bear with a heart sewn with love and a collage of photos courtesy of a dear friend. D
That’s one phrase I always wanted to hear, from any of my childhood or adult pursuits. Dad was wishing it but never there. Mom never thought to think or say it.
I put my handprint in clay! I got 100+ (why didn’t you get 100 ++)! I turned to teachers, aunts of course, friends and their families. In college there were priests (never a wayward moment for them), for education and trying to learn enough to make a difference.
Then business. The awful things people say about priests today I never knew until I met legislators after college. It was all I could do to keep my skirt down in an elevator, but I did do so. Wearing opaque tights helped my defense.
Still, no-one ever said, you did OK. Now I have three-day Thanksgiving cook-fests and sometimes my mother-in-law and I rarely speak, just dance around in time making our dishes. She’s OK, and I know she knows I’m OK because she lets me use the oven. No, really she accepted me as her daughter-in-law and that’s OK for me. Did I say three days? I mean it. And this is Texas the land of sweet tea and many desserts.
And the day after I met my father-in-law for the first time he took my husband out of the truck and said “When are you gonna ask her, son? It’s OK with me.” His mother took four more days to say OK but we cook every year even though she moves the kitchen stuff around on me and I have to break the dance and ask where’s the peeler?
There’s nothing like family. Mom’s gone now. Dad’s still never around and we’ve not seen him in two years. Sisters, one may be trying for a reunion after six years.
I was a coach and a consultant and volunteer and the first thing I did was train then reward with compliments. I’m an “Atta Girl” gal and look to reward whenever I can. Corrections are necessary but need not be harsh, only fair and unemotional, on point. With extra training and more compliments.
Atta girls and guys, right here. Keep cooking and make your family proud. Dee
Years ago when I was single I’d often eat a toasted peanut butter sandwich over the kitchen sink. Yes, I bought an $8 toaster. Then I graduated to a Trader Joe’s skillet-toasted dry flour tortilla with their Monterey Jack cheese and salsa. On a plate, not over the sink.
For 13 years I’ve had someone to cook for, and I don’t stop. I’ve even have a meal planned to try first-time from one of my favorite restaurants in SoCal. I’m practicing and doing my own riff which I don’t usually do from a recipe. I do it from ideas all the time but usually try recipes straight up first time then riff.
Like my baby arugula salad with fresh raspberry vinaigrette (including two roasted garlic cloves, white wine vinegar, salt and pepper, 1/8 tsp of sugar and canola oil). It was served with fresh raspberries, a bit of feta crumbles and sauteed procuitto bits. Garnish was a wedge of cantaloupe.
I’m thinking of changing it up. My first calzone, I make pizza dough all the time with Italian soft OO flour. I’m thinking prosciutto, arugula sauteed with roasted garlic, feta, mozzarella, and some dry-roasted pignoli. I’ll fold them up as en papilliotte (when one takes the parchment paper in a heart shape, folds it over and does diagonal folds to keep in a piece of fish and garnishes) with perhaps an egg wash to keep them closed while baking.
Cooking for one is always difficult and lonely and I don’t make many frozen food items, certainly not for my husband, sometimes for me alone. He’s been gone nearly two months now (with a brief Labor Day visit) and I and Zoe The Hipless Wonder Dog miss him.
Neighbors check on me from time to time. As of yesterday a new Swedish neighbor is going to teach me how he makes meatballs and sauce and in turn, I’ll teach him a true Texas chili (originating from Lady Bird Johnson in 1962 where JFK and 5,000 guests descended upon the Johnsons’ Pedernales River Ranch).
One neighbor’s wife is away long-term so we have similar issues of missing people we love. Luckily he’s going to see her next week. We’re not close in the way you think but I share a meal from time to time, he gives me sartorial advice for my husband and always gives our dog a treat. Yes, she has to perform for it because it’s extra to her dinner. I told him about a used bookstore and he already knew about it from taking his wife to the airport.
Bonds are stretched with missing spouses. I tend the community herb garden and cook with all my other household duties, and take out the dog five times a day and write. It is good to know that there are kind people around me who plan activities or just check in for good measure.
Anything to keep me from a peanut butter sandwich standing over the kitchen sink. Creativity and new things as J says. Cheers! D & Z
Posted in Editorial, Pet, Recipe Ideas, Recipes
It is something I’ve believed in my entire life. I thought the founding fathers trusted each other and the people and the fact that we could become a nation.
I will always believe (unless the story is ridiculous) before I am betrayed. Let’s just say I won’t give in to the Nigerian Spam Scam Scam, a wonderful two-person play but playwright Dean Cameron hit the mark on this one. A charity should send old, lonely folks waiting for the phone to ring to see this. With other old, lonely folks so they can laugh and get together for coffee and become friends who no longer wait for the phone to ring.
As one gets older and hopefully wiser, politicians are just guys asking for a paycheck and health insurance for life. I could have gone that route but chose not to do so.
Everyone is in sales, whether you’re a lawyer, plumber, doctor or CEO. Yet our elected officials sometimes get lower trust ratings than used car salesmen.
We have abandoned trust. We think my family only wants my money, my lawyer only wants the fee on the settlement. My assistant will be let go for incompetence and she’ll sue me for harassment.
High rise buildings, neighbors hear your key in the lock and close the elevator door anyway. Dog owners who pick up their 15 lb dog because they think my 30 lb dog will kill it. Perhaps sniff the dog’s butt and nose, nothing more, tails wagging all the time would work a lot better.
Faith. I have faith that people are good. Some of that is instilled by my parents but some is pure instinct. It helps to try to sort out a good situation from a bad one and act accordingly.
My husband sleeps soundly. So soundly he and the dog slept through a Cat. 5 hurricane for ten hours. If I had to take out the dog in the middle of the night if she was ill, he wants me to be safe because sure as heck he’s not going to wake up. The dog slept through a storm I watched last night right by windows. As long as I stayed on the bed, she was safe and could sleep. That is trust. Dee
Weeks ago we got dog Zoe an educational game consisting of a round MDF base with nine wood pieces, six pegs and three sliders. Basically the humans place a treat in each hole and add the pegs and sliders. Zoe’s now got the game down to 45 seconds and loses pieces under living room furniture. Then it’s our turn to get down there and find them and put them all away for the next time.
We’ve a huge missing piece of the Dee/Zoe game now. My husband. He has been gone across the country for nearly two weeks now trying out what may become a new job. He’s very busy and it would take 12 hours for him to get to our airport lobby on a Saturday and perhaps go out to the car (on a cool day) to say hello to Zoe, then turn around another 12 hours and go back to work. That doesn’t make any sense time wise or monetarily.
This is the longest we’ve been away from each other in our 13 years and with the time difference we rarely get more than a few minutes to speak on the phone. Zoe always knows it’s him when he calls, must know by my voice and key words, and lays by the door expecting him to come home from work in 20 minutes. We’ve only had 30 second calls from work in the past when he was in or near the neighborhood: I’m coming home dear, do you need anything? No, we’re fine. Just come home. My lasagne is in the oven.
[Change that to there’s pot roast in the oven, or I’m marinating skirt steak and working on Chimichurri and everything else and need you to to man the grill.]
Just come home, dear, and we can figure out where our new home might be. I miss you. Dee
p.s. He won’t come home for anything with eggplant in it, thus my stellar Moussaka is a bust here but I could always make it as a gift. Always live on on the bright side of the street. d
Tagged dinner, educational game, games, home, missing a spouse, Zoe
Cooking with Dee 