You can make this your bride-zilla day or you can say to yourself and your husband-to-be that your marriage is more important than your wedding day.
Our second week of dating we had lunch and talked of such things and I said that. I also said that engagement rings were unfair and I never wanted one. Turns out after we met all the parents and the one grandparent who remains we eloped, I had four days to plan the wedding. We got a dear friend a license to marry us. Eight of us were there and everyone had a role.
We did the wedding, two lovely 18K gold rings, dress, shirt, tie, flowers (a gift) reception and weekend honeymoon for under $2K. Yes, after the wedding and luncheon we hosted, we went to our new home and called our parents.
All the bridal magazines show photos of fiancees lying together on the sofa reading the paper or doing a crossword together. I can tell you in over twelve years, nearly 11 married, that does not happen in real life.
First, my husband is very tall. We have an L-shaped sofa so we can lie head-to-head watching the latest Burn Notice.
What I can tell you is that this weekend I had a 24-hour bug and my husband took the dog out all day and fed her, and went to the store and got me chicken soup and ginger ale.
When he goes away on business the dog takes over his pillow so when I reach out to touch his shoulder I feel fur. I go through the day wanting to tell him something and he’s not there.
We know when to hold hands walking down the street without even talking to or looking at each other. I know when to take his arm on snow or ice.
I’m a really good cook but for a guy who had one frozen lasagne purchased by his mother on a visit, string cheese and one 72-oz. soda in his frig when we met, and a litter of string cheese wrappers going from frig to computer, now he compares a four-year to a five-year cheddar. Yes, he tells people I created a food snob.
Lest you think it’s all about who’s sitting at which table, the dress, how many bridesmaids forget it. Yes, it a big day for both of you, not just the bride.
The proof is in the pudding.If the marriage works out, it’s like reading a well-loved and well-worn book every day. And you miss them when they’re gone, even for one day.
He asked if I wanted kids. I said let’s get a dog and see how bad you are first. He’s horrible, sneaks food off his plate and spoils her rotten. We were not able to have children together and decided not to adopt. Today we have a loving dog for nearly 10 years who is so content on his pillow, though she follows me around 24/7 that even though he’s gone she knows I’ll not leave her. That’s married life. Trust, love, honor, respect, and flowers every once in a while….. Dee
Cooking with Dee 